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THIS IS YOUR MISSION, SHOULD YOU CHOOSE TO ACCEPT: Your cell phone rings. It's an intern with the Don Imus Radio Show. Are you willling to mediate a conversation between Don and the student athletes of the Rutgers basketball team?
posted by mediatorblog @ 6:22 AM
4 comments
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4 Comments:
I wonder if this is just another publicity stunt. In order to facilitate a conversation I would want to caucus first with Don and (separately) with representative of the Rutgers team to determine what the goals and parameters of the conversation should be. First, do no more harm.
Restorative justice principles should apply here. The power of recognition and acknowledgment can result in insight and reconciliation for all parties. Don says he wishes to make an apology. Preparation is needed for this meeting. With Don - to explore the meaning of apology and how to be accountable for offending these young women. "I'm sorry you were offended" won't cut it. Also Don needs to have some idea of what harm has been caused and what needs to be done to make things right. I would proceed with setting up the meeting if preparation on these issues makes a face to face conversation appropraite.
Whether there should be a meeting or not should be driven by the needs and interests of the Rutgers team members. If we apply restorative justice principles to this conversation, then it should be first and foremost sensitive to the needs of the victims. I see great potential for revictimization here. It would be interesting to know the training and orientation of the person(s) who met with the team members when they made their decision to meet with Imus. It's gratifying that they didn't feel they had no choice but to meet with him. The media seems primed to expect unconditional foregiveness and the singing of Kumbaya. That is unrealistic and provides another dynamic that may cause re-victimization of these young women.
What doesn't the media get "foregiveness?" Some simple-minded questions are being asked by reporters. Last night a reporter asked the Rutgers team coach if she could "forgive and forget." Perhaps these athletes can put this episode behind them, but its unrealistic to expect that for the rest of their lives they will be able to look back on their team's achievement without also thinking about the racial and gender slur associated with it. Forgiveness has many layers. Perhaps they can gain some understanding of the motive, character shortcomings, or cultural pressures that led to Imus' remark. Perhaps they can accept the fact that we have a societal problem that was not directed to them personally but as a symbol for their race and gender. Perhaps they can even develop some compassion for Imus' failings. Most people think of forgiveness in terms of wiping the slate clean without further recompense. The Rutgers team should not be faulted if they choose not to go there. It would be unrealistic of Don Imus to expect it. From the public remarks aired in the media, it doesn't appear that he does expect the Rutgers women to forgive and forget. Let's hope the media does not become the tool for revictimization.
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